Black Man's Rant: Why I Don't Date Black Women
Written by A Guest Blogger (we are just the outlet!!!)
They Say, “The Blacker the Berry, the Sweeter the Juice.” Wait, I don’t even like berries.
The Blacker The Berry The Sweeter The Juice: Wait I Don't Even Like Berries
Preface: My mother is going to kill me.
Here lately I’ve been getting in arguments with my sistas about their hair. A few things:
- I hate when women wrap their hair before bed. Hence, why I have two silk pillows on my bed, “just in case, they don’t want to get their hair messed up, [messing] with a [brother]” as Katt W. said.
- I hate when some Black woman asks me what I think of her hair when she chops it off and goes, Happy I’m Nappy natural. I think the same thing each time, “That was stupid. (In the “That was easy” voice)
- I hate the argument that Black women have problems working out because they sweat their hair out. I believe there are plenty of Black women who manage to work out and not sweat their hair out, that’s why they are in shape and others aren’t.
And then suddenly it hit me, it’s been a while since I talked to a woman with Black hair. And you know what? Seriously, just one day I just lost the urge to talk to Black women at all. I don’t think I’ve ever said, I’m done talking to Black women, I think one day I just said to myself, I’ve had enough I’m no longer limiting myself to a group of women just because they are Black. And this translated into me just not meeting or interacting with them on a romantic level anymore.
This was not spontaneous, it was gradual in nature. I think back on life and I’ve always had a thing for “redbone” or “high yella” women. In fact, the Summer of 2003 joke about me used to be that I like them, “light, bright and damn there white” or “oh yeah, lighter than that.” The last Black girl that I seriously dated was a “redbone” with hazel eyes. Sooner or later I was bound to just cross on over.
I never was the type to date solely in my race, my girlfriend in middle school was white. Oh and let’s be clear, she wasn’t a white girl from around the way, she was white. I went to a predominantly white school for college, I was in a predominantly white major, and I hung around a pretty diverse group of people. Naturally, I had sex with white women. It was never a big deal for me. And it wasn’t just white women, because it was Latina sisters too. Being from DC, once going to NY, I discovered different nationalities of Latinas, such as, Dominicans and Puerto Ricans. But still, “light, bright, and damn there white.”
So after a few bad experiences with Black women in DC after school, I just gave up on being the token Black guy. Yes, the token Black guy, a guy who is predisposed to only Black women for fear of persecution. And so I’ve now become a Black man who believes he has a great chance of never dating a Black woman again, unless she’s mixed.
I know the readers would like to know why, and I’ll tell you… I’ve noticed a REAL big difference when in relationships and dealings with white women.
I do not have to carry the race with my interactions with white women. With Black women, you are representing for the whole race and gender of Black men. You deal with the baggage of every Black girl lost. And you’re just not trying to hear all that. I don’t want to deal with how Black men are always cheating and leaving some Black women for a White woman. I do not need to hear about how some Black man is always skipping out on his responsibilities. I do not need to hear about how Black women have carried the race for so long, that it’s time that Black men stepped up to the plate. I don’t need to hear that Black men ain’t sh*t. Excuse my French. Quite frankly, I’m not those men, so don’t compare me to them.
I’m not finished with this topic. When I make a mistake, I now get the punishment of a repeat offender. It’s like if I cheat on a Black woman, because I cheated on a woman, I get punished for every other Black man who cheated and got caught or didn’t get caught. No, this is the present, I’ve made a mistake, and this may be my first mistake and I need to be able to make mistakes or this won’t go anywhere whatsoever. Lastly, when she makes a mistake, she can write it off by comparing it to the things that Black men have done in the past.
There’s a sense of entitlements that should not exist. One of the things that caused me to get extremely frustrated with dating Black women was the sense of entitlement to dictating the way everything should go, as if they were owed something. They didn’t have to earn anything. When I was dating outside of Black women, that was different. I’ll give you two examples; Latina women will cook for you, Black women will tell you, “I ain’t your mother.” White women will chill in the house when you’re broke, Black women will tell you the second you decline going out, “How come we don’t ever go anywhere?!”
I know there are exceptions to the rule. But I’m very adamant about saying, that we are not judged by our inconsistencies, but by our consistencies. And if the large majority of you are one way, you need to huddle with your people about what the majority voice is before coming to me claiming to be the exception. I’ve been consistently happier dating white and Latina women than I have been dating Black women. I actually felt like I could be myself, I wasn’t living up to some norm or standard that I didn’t have any part in creating. Quite frankly, I haven’t been in a setting where it was predominantly Black since the sixth grade, it only makes sense that I need someone who understands that I’m multi-faceted. No, I’m not a Black man who doesn’t know he’s Black, I’m a Black man who knows he’s Black enough to not need to see a Black woman everyday to know that he’s Black. I’m a Black man who’s strong enough to say, as it stands for me, I just don’t think I’m compatible with most Black women.
Am I saying that I will never date a Black woman again? No, I’m merely saying it’s unlikely.
Reader’s Note: Through out this blog you may have noticed that I capitalize the “B” in Black, but do not do the same for the term white. I do this because Black is a race in America that represents a group of people who do cannot and do not trace their roots back to anything but Black. While white is a race, it is a placeholder for many people who can trace their roots back to a nationality but choose to use the term white to distinguish themselves from Black people.
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Tags: black man's rant, black women, guest bloggers, nappy hair, natural hair, non stop radio, white women, why i dont date black women
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Comments (131)
lauren
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oh and i forgot, since you have been going to lots of predominatly white schools mabye you need to widen your social sphere, i kno you said you hang out with diverse people, but people are diverse within the confines of their skin color, that doesn’t affect personality, mabye culture. I don’t think black women are putting that pressure on you, i thnk you are putting that pressure on yourself. aite im done now lol
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Megan
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I agree 100% with your article. Yes, I am what you call black. My mother is half filipino & my father is half ethiopian, but I am black. I am also the same color as Gabby union. So I’m guessing that makes me dark skin. Any how. I agree with you completely. I’ve watched my friends and their relationships and its just drama completely. I understand why so many black men date outside their race, and honestly. I would encourage it. I guess a lot of these black women have issues because they aren’t raised with both parents, and they see the disrespect that their mothers give. I am just very thankful I am not like a lot of these black women, and that I grew up in a two parent household (my parents have been married for almost 23 years.) Black women in america will never get it through their heads. they just wont. I grew up in Arizona (Phoenix/Scottsdale) where its white, white, white lol. I had maybe three black friends. I hung out with white girls and a few asians, and latina’s and other races. I’d try to hang out with some black girls and they do not like me. And as far as black men. I would date them, but I mostly date white and asian. Thats what I grew up around.
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cut the bull
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people who make it their business to create a blog about why they dont date their race are usually some attention seeking fools that really want their own race but cant seem to find what they want. so they make excuses for hy they date the “others.” If you are truly happy with the “others”, you would have no reason to blog about it. you would just do it and live your life. This fool aint happy with what he has. thats obvious. Go find yourself a black chick and stfu.
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Gertrude
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ya… u havent dated an african woman yet smh
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Tminnie
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This article isn’t really specific. You probably underwent a few heartbreaks with African American women who didn’t cook for you or cheated on you and you critize. You claim Black women make generalization about Black men and you stand their and critize a whole group as well. Your preference for different races shouldnt be made upon simplistic ideologies. Also instead of building a nation, and maybe conducting group counseling or Black Women forums you flee and want to say Black Women will never be fixed to your preference. You’re mad and simply selfish. You reading along makes me aware that you need work. Understand the rites of passage of a Black Man in Western Society and you’ll find why Black Women are Beautiful and Unique. There are African women, African American, African Latina, African Asian, you sir are limited, and really do not understand the meaning of multi-faceted, because you judge!
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kady
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cut the bull….. my point excatly
If people stop worring about dumb shyt they’ll find somebody white or black.
yall need to just live, DAMN!
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MissE
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Funny how this guy doesn’t appreciate Black women generalizing Black men, but does EXACTLY that.
I also REALLY have a problem with the part that says, instead of saying that I’m the exception to the rule (which in many of the examples he gave, I am) I’m obligated to go & huddle up with my fellow Black women???
How ridiculous.
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Jasmine
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Sounds like you’re not comfortable with black culture as a whole – or your perception of it, anyway. But more importantly…. Was your intent with this article to bash black women as a whole, attract nonblack women (unlikely since no one knows who you are), or cause drama? Was this in response to something someone else said to you?
If this was unprompted, then I agree with kady: just live your life. Who cares what your preference is? And even if they do, will it stop you from doing what you want anyway? Articles like this just encourage further separation between black men and women.
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Donn Lloyd
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I understand how you feel. This is truly a dialogue we need to have. Ladies, as we will always say–if this doesnt apply to you, don’t worry about it. If you protest, then let’s chat and see if what he is saying is true or not. It goes both ways.
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Leogoddess
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I’m glad for you. I don’t miss you at all. WE won’t miss you at all. I have a wonderful black man whom I cook for every night and I’m am NOT an exception. How can you generalize us when you just stated that hardly interact with us. Go with your nonblack women and live your life. We don’t wanna hear about it. We don’t care.
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Sonya
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So sad…
My black brother…born of a black woman let me say this (and I won’t harp because in your case it’s useless). I will agree that some sisters have issues (as all women do), however the mere fact that you are giving weak ass reason why you don’t want a “Black” women like her “hair” is just a cop out. The word that chokes me the most is you saying a Black woman feels entitled. Well sir I will not speak for myself when I say you are DAMN right I am entitled! I am entitled to be with a Black man who respects, loves, honors and cherishes me, our union and our commitment to each other. You are more than welcome to have a woman outside of OUR race…that is your choice, but to talk down about the very race of women that you are a part of is the WEAKEST thing a man can do. So instead of blaming US sisters for your short comings MAN UP, take responsibility and help a sister who is in need instead of saying things to discredit us! Last but not least keep in mind that when they (white women) are tired of your ass it is the Black women that takes you back and cares for you. SMDH!
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TASHA
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Wow r u kidding me!!! Are we still in the days where BLACK MEN think they are experts on BLACK WOMEN? My brother (and i use that term loosly) u need to get a grip and come back to planet earth. No Real Black woman even cares who u date. Just like u feel ALL BLACK MEN ARE NOT THE SAME, ALL BLACK WOMEN ARE NOT THE SAME. I could go on and on but really who cares what race u date. men are men and women are women (not the race). There are dead beat black white hispanic chinese blah blah blah ppl. Get a grip sweetie and get educated.
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mel
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Hmm. Self hate maybe….Well i have news for you.. this is what the media and entertainment industry want you perceive us in a negative manner. And they are succeeding and guess who scooping BW.. yes you guess it WM. This tactic has been done for soo long that it came to the point that some of you BM even hate the black mothers that birth you. And those same people (media & entertainment) laughing and saying these Black men don’t even respect their own women i guess using BET for negative images is working and making money from such. Sad… but true. Men from other cultures are intergrading with BW as well but.. oh i forgot you will never hear this from the media will you but it’s happening. Race shouldn’t matter. But there are always going to be BAD APPLES IN EVERY RACE so that you know.hehe
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jaykellz
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love is universal your color shouldnt make a difference
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RealMsAmira
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its so much i can say to this house nigger but im a leave it like this. the only thing you want is attention and someone to actually care about how you feel. you dont like black woman WHO CARES!! why are you blogging about it, obviously this all a call for help poor thing.
p.s. im a Black woman who dated a puerto rican man for 4 yrs, not cause of his race but the way i felt about him.
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TiffNicky
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Everyone is entitled to their opinion and preferences. Although I don’t agree with the majority of your views of Black women, I’m not going to bash you or question your blackness. What I will say…you need to get out more. It seems to me that you’ve lumped Black women into categories based on your limited interactions and media depictions.
I’d venture to say for every 1 negative stereotype you’ve placed on the women you mention above, I can introduce you to a minimum of 2 Black women that are the opposite. Unfortunately, for you, I’d never do that. You do not deserve to be introduced to women that prove your theories and opinions wrong. You see, if you’ve given up on the chance of them existing why would anyone show you they do? It’s foolish, and you’d probably look for a flaw to prove otherwise. They also deserve better than what you obviously have to offer, namely, someone that appreciates them and accepts them for who they are.
The reality is Black women could write a similar post about Black men, but most of us wouldn’t. We don’t let a few bad apples spoil the bunch for the rest of Black men. We too, have options outside of our race, and I’m happy that more and more of us are exercising those options. It’s disheartening to hear such negative things being said by men that look like us. But when we learn that you don’t value that commonality, we realize you are not what we want in the first place.
I wish you luck in love, because everyone deserves it. But next time write about who you do date, not another post demeaning the group you choose not to date. Black women have enough critics, we could do without this as well.
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CreoleLady
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True story,
My cousin HAD the same feelings as the “Guest Blogger”. For many years my cousin was in a terrible relationship with an awful woman who didn’t want to work, played mind games, played power battles, combative, ghetto, low class, cheated, used and abused him. I mean this woman (who just happens to be black, light skinned green eyed black woman) put him through the ringer. He even adopted her two kids from two different baby daddies.
My mother, his mother, my sisters, and I all tried to tell him that she was bad news he just didn’t end things soon enough with her. I’m not quite sure of “the straw that broke the camels back”, but finally he left her. He was bitter, hated ALL BLACK WOMEN, and vowed to never look in the direction of another black woman.
Fast forward, he meets a Latina and falls head over heels. He’s telling me about a world wind romance with this woman. He says she’s got all her own hair, she bought me a drink at the club, she has a job. So I asked him about her hiSTORY. He tells me she has 9 kids, divorced, and going through “issues” with her ex-husband. I told him she seems suspect to me the way she was latching on so quickly to him and telling him about ALL her “issues”, but he was so caught up in her having a job, nice long her with light skin. So me being the protective cousin once again tried to warn him not to get invovled too soon and make the same mistakes. He didn’t want to hear it, called me jealous -angry -bitter black woman, who couldn’t stand to see a black man happy with a woman of a different race( mind you my BESt friend of 20 years is Mexican and White who is married to a black man and I am the Godmother of their children).
To make a long story short my cousin got into a fight at work and lost his job, and when that happened he also lost his Latina girlfriend she told him, “I can’t be with a man who doesn’t have a job, and it’s your fault you lost yours. I have 9 kids to raise and I am not taking care of a grown man”.
And now guess where he is???? THAT’S RIGHT BACK AT HOME WITH HIS BLACK MOTHER!!! LOL!
Where’s this so called “understanding” other races of women have over black women? Where’s the “support’? Seems to me this was a woman on a mission to find and seduce a man to help her take care of another man’s children. My cousin with his overwhelmingly shallow a$$ was just her ticket.
I’ve tried to tell him that the QUALITY of the woman should be important……he basically found the same woman he had before, she was just a different race.
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Tiffany
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bahahahahaha. this is too funny..
I swear, i’ve always caught shit from “da brothas” about dating white men, and i’ve never actually held any resentments to spite them. Quite simply,it wasn’t about black men, or anyone else , but just my preferences.
However, you hold black women in such contempt, and use every stereotypical assault for criticism, as if you needed an excuse to justify why you date out of your race.
It looks like fun so i think i’ll play a little devil’s advocate for a moment:
!. Black men overcompensate out of fear of being inferior , hence overly aggressive, promiscuous, confrontational, arrogance, and ego centric.
2. Black men abandon their families, just as they have for decades, a cycle they don’t intend to break, yet place enormous responsibility on the black mothers of their children, who go on to raise their illegitimate sons who will in time begin to resent his mother, thus, projecting it outwardly towards every black woman he crosses.
3. Black men are self absorbed, flashy,and materialistic, spending their earnings on luxuries most can’t afford, yet sit idly by while steeped in debt. Rims, Athletic Shoes, Electronics, low end urban uber expensive name brand clothes….
4. Black men aren’t educated, this threatens the overly confident, ego driven false bravado they’ve spent their lives obsessing … When threatened with logic, they quickly shift gears and begin to defensively hold whomever, or whatever circumstances as excuse * usually racial, as the deterrent restricting him. Case in point, the white man , black women, society, america, slavery. etc
Well, that was fun , i can see what the guys get out of it
That was fun !
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IndependentBlackMan
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Across the board, White women just treat men better than Black women. White women value their relationship with whatever man they choose, regardless of his race. Also, White women understand that there is a certain onus on their part to make themselves attractive if they want the better men.
Life with a Black woman is constant complaining, begging, and disrespect. As a rule of thumb Black women have absolutely no respect for Black men. This is how you act when you think you are the only show in town. BW behave as if they have a monopoly on BM. This was true during Jim Crow but is no longer. When there is competition one must learn to do better.
As a man, I have to compete with other men for the best looking women. White women understand this rule when it comes to the most attractive men. Black women have not learn this. Black women put all their energy into impressing their girlfriends. This why most of them have plenty of girlfriends and no man. White women are the opposite. They put their energies into their men. This is why most of them have husbands and not a bunch of girlfriends.
I feel I can speak for a large number of Black men: we are tired of fake hair; we are tired of fake eyes; we are tired of fake nails; and we tired of fake college degrees; and we are tired of the fake women these things represent.
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jasmine
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Lol, this is the most dumbest article I’ve read in a long time.
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jasmine
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Black men are seriously the worst. Theres no problem with black guys dating interracially, if you have a preference then you have a preference but why do you guys ALWAYS feel the need to bash black women in your process? Thank God the black men in my family arent as ignorant as the blogger, I would be disgusted and embarassed.
To the independentblackwomen, STFU. I am a black woman with real hair, real eyes, real nails AND a college degree. I have a full time job, no kids and no sds, but I would bet that most black men can’t say the same. Who cares if you like white women..go ahead & date them! who’s stopping you? I love how you guys always announce that ya’ll dont date black women, like a trophy is deserved? Stupidity at it’s best!
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Shelia
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I am a BW married to a WM and boy am I glad that I did. I called my husband in to look at this post and we are both laughing at you because you are so stupid. Please do all of my single sisters a favor and date non-Blackwomen because you will not be missed. I stopped dating BM a long time ago and I am so happy to see more Blackwomen have read the memo and are dating/marrying WM.
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Xana
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I’m really beginning to think BM & BW should just stay away from each other…I have issues with BM, as many BW do, so I don’t/ didn’t date them (I’m currently married.) I don’t need to hear about how I dress ‘funny’, or how the hair that naturally grows out of my head is ‘too nappy’, how I ‘act/talk white’, or what a ‘dummy’ I am for being bubbly, or try to decipher ghetto slang that I don’t care to use, nor do I want to deal with a BM’s emotional damage in general. I have my own problems I’m trying to work out. Also, non-BM like to get married, lol.
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Jonaye
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Hi, I’m 15 and I read this article because I just wanted to know why black guys are suddenly starting to hate black women. I’m a milk chocolate and I hear guys talk about redbones and light skin girls. I think that I’m just As beautiful. Maybe I dot have hair As straight As theirs or eyes As light As theirs by I’m still beautiful-just the way God intended me to be. Honestly, light skin black girls are the same as us darker skin girls. They’re just a lighter shade. I heard the term the lighter the brighter the better and I don’t think that’s true. I hink hearing people like you writing such a stereotypical blog or whatever this is degrades black women and you NEED to be ashamed. I understand everyone has his or her own opinion but you just totally idk…I’m hurt that people feel that way about darker skin black girls. Its just a few that give us all a bad name Nd that goes with any race so the fact that you have decided to go off of and promote these stereotypes just magnifies your obvious ignorance about the TRUE beauty and DIVERSITY of black women. I guess its up to US strong, beautiful, and confident black ladies to let each other know how beautiful we are and how much we matter. I do hope that you find someone that will make you happy and I wish you the best. (:
Sincerely,
A lovely milk chocolate sexy and BEAUTIFUL BLACK YOUNG LADY!! (:
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Mackenza
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I am Half black half white, and let me say that I have never dated- and will probably never date a black girl. I like being half black but I personally do not like black features( big lips, nappy hair etc.) in which I did not inherit; and I don’t like the sterotypical “attitudes” that black women have. I like girls my skin color ( i,e phillapino or latino) the most. I am sure there are black women and white women who have a preference and this is just my own.
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A REAL BM
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I feel like what you’re saying is true for black women in the ghetto, and there are a lot there. At the end of the day all thE beautiful black women get taken up light or dark and we leave all the ugly fat loud ghetto ones alone. And if we got caught up having fun on a slow night (yes blacken resort to subpar women when in need, who hasn’t) well we will pay child support rather then hear ur shit everyday. No other ethnicities women try to tear down men and play their role. Black women do it regularly. But don’t get it twisted theres plenty of sisters out there that get taken up. PLEEZ NOTICE ONLY THE UGLY LOUD ONES ARE ALONE HENCE WHY YOU HEAR ABOUT IT SOOO MUCH. Black men aren’t suckers, we won’t get stuck with a straight up bitch and be miserable, even if it means seeing your kid on the weekends. When black men ran the African American movements brothers like mlk and Malcolm x made major social and political advancements in the favor of vp. But white people killed them along with all hope for anyone planning to be a leader with fear. And in turn brainwashed blackwomen into taking the role, glorified the loser BM, and u guys have been mating making ignorant bastard children. If black women are so righteous and hardworking and smart, why r y’all so fucking dumb and keep breeding with jailbirds instead of the good upstanding brothers you see everyday?? Black women have torn America out of resentment of the fact that you work for a white America that has devalued everything you stand for. Which is simply why no one wants the mJority of you. If bw grow up and get with good brothers then there’d be no problem but just like everything else, there’s an excuse as to why bw always chase the thug. It doesn’t matter though because all the sweet beautiful bw are taken up and the brothas that can’t ge them get spanish and west Indian women and the minority of brothers aid small penises settle for the angry blacks or trashy whit girls
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BillyBobWilly
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a black dude that doesn’t date his own race….BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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John Claude
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I agree with you 100%!!! on the black women mentality arguement. I am a black college student and from my experience, black women (with mostly black friends)- rich or poor, college-educated or high school drop-outs- feel SO entitled. It is SO annoying when a black woman talks about what she expects from a boyfriend or future husband. It disgusts me when I hear from college-educated (Northwestern University) black women what type of men they overlook (guys not in black frats, guys not on the basketball team, guys not on the football team). What makes black women special enough to talk like that??? You ignore a lot of successful black men when you start talking like that.
The black women in college that I have dealt with go for the less-intelligent guys (some with no academic plans after college, some with kids already) on the basketball or football team and then complain when they are kicked to the curb!!!! Ridiculous!!!!
Also, black women that I know are FAR too agressive- physically and verbally. They tend to be very loud and cannot lose an arguement at any cost. being overly aggressive is a male trait IMO so don’t want to see that in women.
Black women also change their hair WAY too often and and from my experiences for the worse. They always try radical hair cuts when what most men I know want long hair (curly or straight).
This is why I only go for white, biracial (black + white), or hispanic girls despite being a black man.
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John Claude
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By ‘kicked to the curb” I meant disrespected or cheated on while the guy moves on to the next girl.
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Black Trojan
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John Claude said it right.
The reason educated black women can’t find educated black men is because they turn their backs on them during college. I go to USC, and without fail, every Black girl you try to date will leave you without a second thought if they even think that for a second they have a chance to date an athlete.
Unfortunately, after they have been rejected by these athletes, they maintain an affliction that prevents them from seeing any man under 6-2 or under 180 lbs as anything other than a scrawny, asexual child.
More importantly, they feel that just because they made it “against the odds” by being a Black-woman-in-college, they are entitled to some mythical prince charming who only exists in their minds. They also feel they have the right to be mean, cold, rude, judgmental, and quick to anger.
Unfortunately, the only Black girls on a college campus who are actually worth dating are saving themselves for marriage, (trust me, there are plenty of these, especially on “higher-tier” campuses. My rough estimate is that about 30% of female Black students fall into this category), but I know literally zero Black men who are doing the same (intentionally, at least. I know a few guys who simply aren’t confident with women, but are able to ignore fixing this flaw by hiding behind their religion. I don’t mean to say that all devout Black men have no game, there are certainly some future Black pastors who could date any girl they want, but there are just as many who are waiting for a marriage that they know full well is not likely to happen).
My conclusion to this problem is unfortunately too controversial actually happen, but if it did, it would solve the problem. Black women who are prudes need to start having sex. They think they’re proving their worth to us by waiting until they are married, but in an environment as sexual as a college campus, they can’t starve us out from the one thing that all men are biologically programmed to pursue and expect us to not try to get it elsewhere (i.e. from white women). I’m not saying that the smart, sweet, generous Black girls should become sluts, but unless you are meeting men in church who are also virgins, then your reputation of keeping your legs closed can only harm you.
I would say something like, “no one will think you’re a slut or a whore if you only have sex with your boyfriends in committed relationships,” but no one “dates” or becomes “boyfriend-girlfriend” on college campuses until after they’ve hooked up. This is true across the whole spectrum of religious fervor, devout Christians, moderate Christians, non-Christians, atheists, Muslims, Jews, Hindus, etc. If you plan on remaining a virgin, then without exception, you should expect to stay single.
I know of exactly one couple consisting of two virgins, but they had met before coming to college and broke up because they could not handle the sexual temptation associated with being alone together.
Again, this does not mean Black girls should have sex with every guy who asks on the first date. There is nothing wrong with wanting to get to know someone first, but if you make a man wait for too long, you should not expect him to date you exclusively.
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KfromVA
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It’s SO annoying when black men talk about what they expect from a girlfriend or future wife. Control issues much? A woman is free to change her hair anytime the mood suits her. Her hair is her property. Men who claim hair as a trait that they like on women are certainly not talking about African American natural hair so just date who you like instead of beating around the bush with all of these made up excuses. I feel sorry for the substitute women that you date.They are substitutes because you are saying you are only with them because they are what African American women aren’t. You bascally stated that you date other races because African American women don’t meet your standards(heaven forbid should African American women state that you don’t meet their standards or that they dare have standards to begin with, you know the standards you find SO annoying) Most African American men overlook the nice smart and shy women too, it works both ways believe me I know. So would you bother with other races of women if African American women met your standards? The answer would still be yes because you are attracted to what you are attracted to and African American women have nothing to do with that.
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