Jul 09 Open Letter To Dan Gilbert, Fans, and Haters (Not Really) From LeBron James (@KingJames)

Hi, I'm LeBron James

Dear Dan Gilbert, and everybody else with their opinions about me,

Dan, thanks for the extra publicity. I’m sure your pockets will still be laced whether or not I play for your team or not. Savannah says that was a bitch move you pulled, and you can bet your ass if there’s another season of Boondocks, we’re BOTH gonna be on it.

Everyone else, it’s been real. I’ve made more money in the last 7 years than you’ll probably see in this life and the next one (if you’re into that kinda thing). Thank God I’m not. I’ve done all kinds of cool shit like hang out with Jay-z, and kick it with Warren Buffet. Yup, I gets free car insurance and coca cola all year round…and whens the last time Jay-z made a diss record defending an athlete?

Don’t worry, i’ll wait.

So yeah I want to win, so what?

Sounds like that’s what you want to do also, since you’ve been bitching so much about it.

Yes, I went to the Heat. It’ll keep Savannah on her toes, and in the gym. My kids will get to hang out in the sunlight, and i’ll save a few hundred mil on the new crib. Win win win. Don’t hate.

I don’t say any of that to brag. I just say it cuz it’s true, and it makes you jealous. I’m writing this directly to you, since you muthaf$!ckers on twitter are tired of listening to #sourcesclosetoLeBron.

Well I was gonna finish this, but the President is texting me. He said he wants to play a game of around the world against me…not like you play it though. We are actually going to fly on his private jet to each country around the world just to shoot one basket there.

Love,

LeBron “I’m better than you and have more money” James.

P.S. I will take the chip.
P.S.2. Delonte, tell me how my ass taste.

Written by @rahim_thedream

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